When does an interest become a passion, when does a passion become an addiction?
It feels decidedly strange to have reached a point in my life where the immediate, highly significant people in my life are all descendants, extended family or friends whose primary obligations are to their own families. No parents, no siblings, no partners or lovers. Sometimes it’s sad but mostly it’s odd – a mixture of uncertainty and freedom which at the moment at least is tempered only by my need to be a little conservative with my finances, and my health.
My goodies arrived within a week, discreetly packaged as promised, an event that easily rivalled my last few birthdays in excitement. The hours of “research” seemed to have paid off with a nicely balanced selection of expensive quality toys. I knew some of the limits of my aging body and aesthetic tolerances (although these boundaries have been tested over time). No hard plastics and no “lifelike” body parts. Body safe silicone and rechargeable rather than battery powered. A toy for penetration and one for my clitoris… My selections weren’t cheap but at that time I assumed it was a finite expense rather than a full blown obsession
About four days after mum died I awoke in the middle of a powerful orgasm. This unexpected, and for me, confronting event signalled the reemergence of sexual feelings I thought had gone for ever.